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February 6, 2012

Unexpected Grace

God is at work through the most unlikely people. A helpful reminder for us self-important types.

Some of the most important moments of faith do not come from the places we expect. They may not come from behind a pulpit or an altar, in corporate worship, or during a retreat. Those of us leading congregations are often tempted to think God works through us most. In our best moments, we are able to point to God’s work and simply step aside. But sometimes we forget that the Spirit of God is working even harder than we are. Sometimes this can catch us off guard. Like when I met Annie.

Annie was sitting outside the doors of our sanctuary. She had a battered, plastic blue shovel in one hand, her father’s hand in the other, and drool dripping on her shirt. Her father looked tired. No—beaten. Beaten by the unfulfilled dreams his daughter’s disease stole from him. Beaten by the guilt of wanting something more for his child. Frustrated at a God who would allow his daughter not to be “normal.”

I had just finished leading our children’s worship when I saw his daughter. To my naive surprise, Annie didn’t join the other children during their worship. And at the moment I thought about it, the reason was obvious. Kids with Down Syndrome aren’t like “normal” kids. They belong to the group of “special needs.” And since most churches don’t have the resources to accommodate this segment of our population, families who have to live with this struggle seldom feel fully welcomed.

Annie’s dad just wanted to sit in the service. He and his wife were trading off the responsibility of sitting with Annie. And she didn’t want to go inside, which meant they wouldn’t be able to fully connect during the service.

So with my own, broken sense of self-importance, I sat with them. Prayed with them. Sang with them. All outside the doors of the sanctuary. I had no idea that Annie was going to minister to me in the moments that followed.

I shared with her the Sunday school lesson of the day. And she shared that she understood the story. Then she plopped right next to me and we worshiped together. As I sang the lyrics of the song the congregation was singing, she repeated each line as if they were questions. I nodded along and we played this game of back and forth, where each question would break apart the melody and reveal the meaning. She, with her innocent curiosity, gave me an incredible gift. She helped me see faith through her eyes, and with new vision I was able to see the simple beauty of believing what we were singing. She exposed the awe present in a child’s faith in a way I had never seen before.

Or like when Bo taught me to love a terrorist.

During my first year of youth ministry, September 11 was still a very recent memory. I was very young, overly ambitious, and way too confident in my own abilities to teach the Bible to middle school students. I was trying to offer lessons in synoptic comparisons—the standard curriculum for middle school students!—when it happened.

We were comparing “the Sermon on the Mount” with “the Sermon on the Plain” when a seventh grade boy got a very serious look on his face. After Sunday school had finished and all the other students had left, he sat down next to me and asked what it meant to forgive our enemies. I asked (like all youth workers who aren’t exactly sure where the conversation is going) what he thought.
I assumed he was wondering about how to respond to bullies when he said something that took me completely off guard.

“Do you think Jesus would have forgiven Osama bin Laden?”

Shocked, I pressed the point again. “What do you think?”

His response still sits with me nearly a decade later:

“I think I want to pray for him.”

Or like when I heard the story of the Original Sanitation Worker.

There’s a guy who sleeps on a cardboard box near the front steps of our church. He’s been in the neighborhood for about 15 years, and people have been treating him like he was less than human for at least as long.

He never showers or changes his clothes. Once something he is wearing literally disintegrates, he throws on another layer like fresh paint over a battered wall. But that never contains the smell. He won’t accept food, water, or any type of help. He just digs through the trash, finds food that strangers have foolishly wasted, and stands on the corner of 80th and Broadway as a symbol of what happens when we dehumanize each other.

But the other day, I heard some of his neighbors talking about him. And they see a very different kind of person. They see the guy who digs through the trash for cans and bottles, not for himself, but for the other homeless women and men who share his stretch of the Upper West Side. When they ask if he wants the 30 cents he scrounged for them earlier that morning, he whimsically walks away and shouts over his shoulder, “Mail it to me.”

Why is it that grace continually surprises us? I don’t know. But with all the demands that come with pastoral work, it's easy to allow fatigue, stress, anxiety, a desire to please, the disease of ego, or the busyness that fills all of our lives to prevent us from identifying God’s grace. But that grace appears in unexpected ways and places. And part of our work is to be open to it. To look for it. To claim it as God’s work in God’s people. All so we can mean it when we say, “Amen.”

Related Tags: Formation, Grace, Humility, Pastor's role, Pastoral care, Spiritual formation

Comments

"...the guy who digs through the trash for cans and bottles, not for himself, but for the other homeless women and men who share his stretch of the Upper Westside." I'm sorry, but this anecdote has nothing to do with grace but rather with bondage. This homeless man is in bondage to his sin nature. He is no different than the Wall Street billionaire whom we all like to despise. He is a sinner in need of a Savior. And when he is willing to recognize his sin, repent of it, and believe that Jesus took his place on the cross, paying the due penalty for his sin, then - and only then - will he be a demonstration of grace. Grace is not works; grace is not warm fuzzy experiences; grace is undeserved favor from the one true God who sent His son, Jesus, to die in my place that I would not have to pay the just penalty for my own sin. We have turned the word 'grace' into something it simply is not, thus rendering the truly miraculous meaning of it into something cheap.

@elegance

All around us are whispers and shouts of God's love and grace--in creation, in the lives of both Christians and those who do not yet believe. Scripture speaks of how "the heavens declare the glory of God."

Even in those who are not yet redeemed God chooses to display who He is. "If you, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask." Those who are not redeemed know how to give good gifts to their children. Doing so, in some way, can remind us of God's love for us. And it is, thus, a display of His grace.

When I think of Hell, I think of such loneliness, a void. The fact that I am able to connect with those around me thus reminds me of the greatness of His mercy. Life is a gift. To have others--both believers and those who do not yet believe--in our lives is such a gift, a blessing. Flowers, trees, animals...although all of creation is broken, groaning as in the pains of childbirth for redemption, all of creation can also be a song of God's grace, if we allow Him to give us ears that we may listen well.

(And I don't think the article ever said whether the gentleman was saved or not, anyway).

'Has not God chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith?'

I work with people like Annie - the 'not normal' ones - and have found this verse from James to be very very real and true. Thanks for the stories.

Oh and by the way, presuming (as @elegance did) that because someone is smelly and homeless they must be 'in bondage to sin' has clearly never heard of John the Baptist or Ezekiel or St Francis.

Something my old Pastor used to say when explaining grace and mercy

"Mercy is not getting what we richly deserve, and grace is recieving what we could never earn."

Grace is a gift from G-d, and it doesn't matter what station in life a person is, whether Lazarus at the gate of the rich man, or rich boy on the back of a donkey, it's all dependent on whether we want G-d's grace or not.

Elegance's only mistake is to assume that G-d is the only one to extend grace, and yet the definition of grace is defined by this homeless man...he extends grace to others.

Whether he accepts grace from G-d is another whole other matter, but herein is the contrast which Y'shua brought up in his stories...an individual who is shunned by society, and yet, even that individual is capable of extending grace and mercy to another human being...why can't you do the same?

Atheists are quite good at extending grace and mercy, forgiveness, and reconciliation to those who have offended them...and yet many who do follow G-d, who have accepted G-d's grace seem quite incapable of doing the same to their fellow human beings.

Why is that?

Christopher
When you say...
"But with all the demands that come with pastoral work, it's easy to allow fatigue, stress, anxiety,..."

If these tradition driven realities are preventing you from identifying God's grace, you may want to do serious examination of your perceived "call to to the ministry" (being paid to lead) and check out some of Paul's statements for rejecting the right to be paid to lead.
1 Cor 9:1-14 Typical and logical reasons to be paid
1 Cor 9:15 - end Bigger reasons to refuse the right to be paid.

Here is one statement that refers to the "obstacles in the way of the gospel of Christ" that you have just referred to in your article.
Nevertheless, we have not made use of this right, but we endure anything rather than put an obstacle in the way of the gospel of Christ.

Take off the filters of tradition when you read this. It is profound.

I am that dad that is 'beaten', or, should I say was that dad.

My wife and I have a son with Autism and I know exactly how that man felt/feels. I have often asked why it is that the one place I should feel free to bring my son is the one place I am too embarrassed to bring him to?!?

It isn't other people, it is my sin. I am praying for the strength to just bring my son to worship (we have a cadre of volunteers that work with our son during worship and sunday school), but, I am more and more convicted that this is wrong.

Thank you for reaching out to that family and loving them as Christ.

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